The hot summer weather is usually presumed a good thing, but whilst I enjoy the excuse to eat copious amounts of ice cream, it also signals the increased likelihood of thunder storms. This fills me with a certain element of dread, for I suffer from brontophobia (personally I think that is the greatest phobia name ever!), which means a fear of thunder and lightning storms, which apparently can also be termed as keraunophobia or astraphobia. This is no mere dislike of storms, no it is a proper full-blown fear. Dark clouds on a heavily humid day put me on alert. Quite often rain will come but not always thunder. Even so, if the heavy air indicates a storm I will start to be worried. When sparks fly up from the train home on days like this I am particularly jumpy. Camera flashes on such days don't help either. So, I wander around nursing extra anxiety in my chest on such days.
When a storm really does happen then the fear enters it's full blown realm. I shake, feel horribly nauseous, can't sleep, and definitely, no way, can stay on my own. Even with a whole group of other people my symptoms don't change, but they are considerably worse on the couple of occasions when I have been alone. I also turn off all electrical appliances and stay away from phones and showers (you might think that's crazy, but actually that's sensible advice). Most people wouldn't be phased by such things, especially in the UK. I know, it's not like we live in USA where some regions experience severe thunder storms at certain times of year. I would hate to have my phobia and be living there! My phobia doesn't interfere with daily life, as it can only come to the surface every so often. I'm lucky to be living in Britain for that reason! My other major fear, arachnophobia, exists on a similar premise - I don't come into contact with spiders on a daily basis, but when I do it's not pleasant - I have to run out of the room that I find a spider in and absolutely insist that someone removes the offensive creature from the building before I vomit everywhere.
Anyway, the reason I am blabbering on about my specific fears is that I have real difficulty with people who don't understand, who don't even try to, just because it doesn't scare them. Both family and friends have made me feel pretty stupid for being terrified of storms and spiders. "Oh, you'll grow out of it" they say. Erm...mid-twenties, fears still as acute as always, don't think there's much chance of "growing out of it." Phobias are actually a form of anxiety disorder, and are therefore caused by imbalances in the brain. Usually they are triggered by a past event or ordeal, or they are the effect of nature gone a bit haywire. For example, in evolution it would be natural to be wary of a poisonous snake, and where possible to avoid one altogether, let alone just avoid upsetting it. A phobia of a snake, however, is worrying everytime you walk in the woods you will risk stepping on one, feeling sick when you see one safely behind glass in a zoo, or (like one of my housemates) running out of the room when one appears on a television documentary. The fear is palpable, and being told to "just grow up" or "they can't really hurt you" or "they're not likely to hurt you" is just not good enough. Not to mention a tad patronising. Don't you think I'm aware that a common British house spider can't eat my face? It doesn't mean I want to share a room with it! Don't you think I'm aware that it is unlikely I will ever be hit by lightning, and that thunder itself does no damage? Of course I am, but no amount of pep talk will get rid of a phobia. You can be as logical as you like about it, so can I - I've tried, it doesn't work. And I have really tried with a "can do" attitude. Apparently hypnotism works for some people, not really my game. Cognitive behavioural therapy can work for those with social phobias, and I guess it could for other fears too. Again, would rather not go there. I have no specific event in my life to tie-in with my phobias, none at all. I just have them. I can live with them, as long as people can come to my rescue. I have actually cried and shouted until a family member or friend has removed a spider from the house. They think I'm being an overreactive idiot, so do I, but it only happens a couple of times a year. Same with thunder storms. So it's something I can put up with, even though the experience is very unpleasant for me.
This is just a plea really, to all of you who are lucky enough to be phobialess (yes, I did just make that word up). Have a little sympathy, and count yourself lucky that you don't have to experience physical symptoms and stress when you encounter something your brain believes to be untoward and dangerous.
No comments:
Post a Comment